Thursday, April 21, 2005

Time

Time is such an elusive phenomena. I glance at my arm and see wrinkled skin where 'a few moments ago' it was young and smooth. I remember a mother-in-law's lament of dry skin, thin skin that tore easily. While I have been preoccupied with emotional recovery, my skin has aged. Time. Is it real or only imagined? A mirrored face is older, but the eyes are the same that looked back at the 15 year old in 1962. The soul reflected through those eyes feels the same, does not recognize the passage of what we call time. So does the world age? or only our bodies? Is time only a perception? Why does my soul feel ageless when inevitably my body will die? My skin will cease to be. Will shrivel as my body exhales a half-breath to inhale no more. And love -- where is the love promised? Expected. Wanted. Is it in the children? While I rush to meet man-made deadlines for economic purpose, the elusive Time steals my passion for life ... for painting to leave something of me here when I am gone. It is time to be selective about Time. It is time to be selective of how I spend this day. Time is only now. There is no tomorrow.

Quote for the day, "Lord, help me accept the trials in my life and see your goodness." -- Mary Brown

8 comments:

  1. This is such a magnificent passage Vernita- It is so true how quickly it seems that time goes and how it seems so sudden when we notice the toll on our bodies. I too paint to leave a small "I was here" on this busy planet. And I have noticed my once youthful face etch with time and my hands turning to my grandmothers hand.
    So I paint- as if there is no tomorrow. "Deo Volente"- if God Wills It- one of my works will inspire someone after I have passed- then I will somehow still be here.

    Thank you for sharing- This is a great blog!

    Stella

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  2. Thank you, Stella. It's all from the heart. Sometimes I wonder if I should be posting anonymously.

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  3. Vernita, I was so happy to find the link to your blog while checking my mailbox just now - after being offline for a longer period of time that I would have previously thought possable. Long story and a rather dull one to boot.

    About your blog - it wouldn't do you any good to either change your name or leave it off - I could hear your voice loud and clear as I read your words.

    BTW, you're not alone in wondering why the body that you 'know' is yours has vanished and been replaced with a less than recognizable version of itself. I feel the same each time I allow my eyes to linger a mite too long while combing my hair or (eeks) applying makeup.

    Luckly I've learned to dismiss the things in my mixed up mirror and rely on kinder memories for my self image . . . some of the time.

    Who was it that said "You're as young as you feel"? I don't remember at the moment, but I like their outlook.
    Lia

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  4. Lia, in going through older blog posts I found your comment on my "Time" post. I don't know why I only now found it after six years. I guess we can chalk it up to time, and I hope you clicked the "notify" button so you will get this reply. After a computer crash, I've lost emails. Please write to me if you get this. Thanks so much for your comment.

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  5. This is interesting, I was 15 in 1982, and I am beginning to see changes in my skin. I wrote about it in my link on the red dress blog hop. So, here I am 20 years younger...wondering about aging, and I find this treasure in your blog. You may like mine. It's the one called Quadragenarian..and it has the Norman Rockwell pictures.

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  6. Beautifully written and beautiful blog.

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  7. Jackie, thanks for visiting! I read your piece "Quadragenarian" and loved it. This is serendipity! I've added your blog to my blog reading list. You're a wonderful writer.
    Vernita

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